Facebook Floaters, Bee Gees, A Season, Fresh Meat

bee gees

ECONOMICS

Shares in Facebook closed well below the price at which they were floated amid doubts that the newly listed company can live up to expectations.

Analysts stated that the confidence in the original float had been flushed away as soon as the stock started to plummet.

After a sticky start this morning, the newly deposited stock was soon heading for deep and dark waters, with traders hurrying to closed the lid on their liquidity.

It was hoped that walking away after the initial slump would prevent a big clean up the next trading day, effectively washing the hands of Nasdaq traders. Speaking in private, a Snoozenight investor said that ‘on-paper the deposits are a mess’.

Some analysts said the shares would have fallen on Friday had not underwriters stepped in.

Today, underwriters were straining to release the stock quickly, allowing it fall at pace while being quick to cover-over the new float.

At the end of trading, the offer started to solidify and the shares remained only slightly-backed-up, muddying the waters lightly before a further expected plunge later in the week.

ENTERTAINMENT

Stars of the music industry have been paying tribute to Bee Gees singer Robin Gibb, who has died at the age of 62.

The artist, who’s hits as a performer and songwriter included “Stayin’ Alive”, “Alive”, “Don’t Forget to Remember”, “For Whom the Bells Tolls”, “Immortality”, “Kiss of Life”, “Too Much Heaven”, “When He’s Gone” and “Tragedy”, died prematurely yesterday.

His record company were first to react to the sad news saying simply, “Chaka-Khan’t believe it.”.

He is survived by his wife, two children and his multi-millionaire dentist.

WEATHER

Much of the UK has been basking in warm weather which is likely to continue into next week. But the high temperatures have come soon after a cold April and early May.

In other top BBC news stories today: there was stuff for sale in Tesco, you went to work, a hairdryer blows air, chairs allow people to sit, mirrors reflect, water is wet, pants cover my arse, light is bright and cash rules everything around me show me the money dollar dollar bill y’all.

It’s a fucking weather report, just kill me already.

WALES

Trains heading between Bridgend and Cardiff faced delays and cancellations after a train hit four cows at a level crossing in the Vale of Glamorgan.

Blah blah blah, I “herd” there were “hooves” on the line. Yadda, yadda, yadda, lives were put at “steak”.

De, doo, struggling to get the service “mooving”. Diddle boom tish, the drive did sound his “horns”.

Fiddle dee doo, the track was “udder” construction. Woo Woo, delayed due to adverse “leather” conditions – the track was “friesian”.

Wakka Wakka Wakka, public “meating” to be set up to discuss the event. Bing bang stick it in, the driver was to blame, how “dairy” be so reckless – the cattle population was “cut in calf”.

I’ve run out of “puns”. “Good bye”.

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